Believe it or not, the newly renovated Xfresh fishtank has biometric technology. You press your face against the glass and it detects oil levels and shape, and lets you in.

Not.

We use the Cotag system where you hold your access pass against a tag reader (very much like Touch N Go) and it unlocks the door. For weeks, the door was not set up and could not lock, so anybody could just open the door. They fixed up the security recently so we now have to tag in.

Of course, a certain colleague (who shall not be named) forgot this. (Shows how often he comes in.)

This is the view from outside the office. Notice that below the Xfresh logo in the top-right corner, there is an oily face print!

I saw this colleague smash into the glass with a thud.

“I forgot we had to tag in.”

Well even in the old days before we had to, we’d use the handle (that shiny metal bar on the left), or if we were lazy we could use our hands to push. But to go headfirst?

For once, we can say, don’t use your head.

No it’s not me (my skin is so dry, the only place you can get oil using those blue oil wipes is by pressing on the blackheads on my nose.) No it’s not Shaz either.