What did I do on December 31st, 2006?
I went to two parties.
One had a view which spanned three fireworks launches, like this one in front of the National Museum.
(Okay, so the same spot was the best; KLCC was too smoky and the other one was quite beyond and not as frequent.)
Tilted sideways. Nothing fancy here because I only brought my little Canon Powershot A520, and it’s not as steady as shooting fireworks with the camera pointed upwards. 🙁
At the second party, already January 1st, 2007, the party had died down, and I sat down on a couch. This chick next to me asked me to sign the guestbook.
She didn’t quite recognize it. “Is it a robot?”
I don’t have to be cool (or uncool) to know it’s definitely not organic.
This Iranian dude came up to her, sat next to her, and continued a previous conversation.
“So you’re a lawyer? I saw you and thought you were a writer! Somebody in the creative line. You know, you have really nice hands. Hands of a writer.”
He then examines her hands gently.
“You know, creative people have longer, slender fingers.”
I looked over, and her fingers were much shorter than her palm! Not only that, she was sitting somewhat rigidly, fitting her lawyer occupation. Pickup line fail brader.
He left to get a drink, and she turned to me and asked if I was alright. “You were so still, I thought your friend was drawing your sketch!” (My friend was facing me, scribbling in the guestbook.)
“No, I was just staring into space.”
“…okay, actually, I was eavesdropping. Heh. It’s always amusing to hear a guy pick up a girl. Did it work?”
“No… but he was interesting.”
He returned with more lines. “You know, I like that look of yours. It’s like slightly annoyed. I think you’d look very sexy when you’re angry. If I saw you in a bar, you know, I’d just go up to you, kiss you, and then talk.”
They then talked about politics, and travelling in the Middle East. I dozed off.
I’m not sure if he leaned over to kiss her, as turning would blow my cover.
She then left, as her transport was leaving.
Chapter Two
The Iranian dude then chats up my friend. At this point I wasn’t in earshot and didn’t bother, but the friend I came with and I gossipped about it. I quickly gave her the 411 on his attempt on the lawyer, to see if he’d repeat the same things.
Soon, his hand reached over her back.
We went across the hall to sit elsewhere, out of earshot but still able to see them.
“Are they kissing, Albert?”
“No, you can see his head is at that angle… and she’s nodding.”
“Are they kissing now, Albert?”
“No, not yet… I can still hear him talking somewhat.”
“OOO! Now they’re kissing! See her head’s like tilted. Oh now they’re talking. Okay now they’re kissing.”
He then examined her hands. Aha! He did use that trick after all.
We then left the hall to leave them to have fun.
I found this rather disturbing view from a room window.
Morning came, and they were cuddled up on the couch, all lovey-dovey and holding hands. “Let’s go for breakfast!”
As we sat in a mamak in daylight, it was then that we saw the Iranian dude in his full uh… glory. Unibrow, bushy chest, big nose, and ugly, cavity-full yellowed teeth! He looked alright in the dark, cool and suave even, but in daylight we got quite a shock.
Me and my two female friends all looked at each other, sharing the same expression. This was something we could make fun of her for years!
I never quite believed in beer goggles until this experience.
She was, however, still putting her hand on his lap.
In the middle of a conversation, he pulled out a green wine bottle from under the table and drank it. That was a most comical moment indeed.
“So I’ll send you back to your apartment?” my friend asked.
“Nah it’s cool, I’ll take a cab back.” he said.
We got in the car.
“AIYEE! OH MY GOD! I can’t believe I made out with that guy!”
“Yeah, but you were all so lovey-dovey right?”
“Yeah, he so thinks I’m gonna call. He gave me his number but I didn’t give him mine.”
“Wow, that’s smart.”
“Yeah, lucky I did that. You know, in the morning lying beside him, I realized that hey, I didn’t even know his name!”
I’m glad for her and that little plot twist. 😀
As I walked home after it all, my road was sprinkled beautifully. Welcome 2007! (I’m not that lagged; I bumped into a lot of people at Laundry Bar on the 11th of January but everybody wished me Happy New Year anyway.)