Category Archives: General

Peels

So I slept at 11pm Monday, and 11:30pm Tuesday. Accomplishment!

The rest of this is a majorly procrastinated post.

Back in the days of school, I used to sleep a solid 8 hours. Yeah, I was proud of it then. Getting into work and college and online addictivity got me on 6 to 2 hours of sleep. 🙁

Jenifur once wondered why time seemed to pass much faster now.

I attribute it to sleepiness. Back in school everyone was good and sober and came home in the afternoon and went to sleep at 10pm and remembered how to program their VCR to record late night talk shows.

Nowadays we’re complaining and being proud of staying awake for 48 hours, but for what? We’re comparing eyebags and dunking teabags like it was a good thing.

Time goes faster when you’re sleepy.

I can’t even sleep past 10 hours! When I do get enough sleep, I find the day to be slower because everything is more vivid and I’m more aware of the time slowly creeping. Waiting for/in public transport is a chore only when you’re wide awake. Smelly people and pervy oppurtunists only bother you when you’re wide awake. Don’t worry about missing your stop; routine will make your body clock instinctively wake you up one stop before.

I have a digital watch that has a countdown timer and a stopwatch so I will be awakened when I reach the bus stop. So what if you old fogeys think analogue watches are more classy, I value practicality and punctuality. Or I’m too sleepy to care.

I am now wide awake, and I can tell you this: Heightened consciousness is a real bother.

One Third Awake

I slept at what was technically 5am Sunday. I woke up at 3pm for lunch, then went back to sleep. I woke up at 6am Monday. That makes 18 hours.

People can be so proud of staying awake for 72 hours, but whatever for? It’s even harder to stay asleep that long. My phone beeped at 10pm. I woke up and struggled to get back to sleep on the 10th hour.

Botak Chin

I bumped into an old friend in a shopping mall, and this transpired a week later. His messages are in bold.

Hey
Hola!
Been wanting to tell you this for almost a week
Hola to you too…

Sup?
Hahahaha
So yes what do you wanna tell me?
Remember my ex-housemates who were with me at 1U the other day?
Yeah
Well, if it’s any compliments, they think you’re cute
BUT… with a queer for a straight guy moment…
They recommended that you should shave off the goatie
And I quote them “it makes him look weird”

How weird?
Are they your roomies from THAT SS2 house?
Hahaah… bingo
I dunno how weird, you go ask them yourself la..
LOL

I DO intend to actually, I think it’s long enough to have proven its point, and I’ve probably impressed enough people as the “chinaman who can grow a beard”
What do YOU think?
Beard or no beard?
All I can say is…
I do agree with them
LOL…
(sorry, bro)

See, I wanna be attractive to girls not gays
It kinda makes you look like you’re nowhere in between
Hahahaha
Trust me
If gays dun like it

Nowhere in between? In between what two extremes?

He didn’t reply, so I went for lunch, and when I came back he was gone.

Oooh Friday night was fun, I bumped into old old friends all over Hartamas! So then, the verdict was made. Everybody saw the beard. It was time to go. Sorry Suanie!


Left: Botak Chin. Right: Chinaman can grow beard you know.

Botak is Malay for bald, by the way.

On Saturday morning, nobody noticed! It seems that people notice that there was a beard, but nobody noticed that it was gone.

Ah well, there won’t be any more Chinese chicks asking me for directions in Malay. 🙁

Edit: Ooh! Till the last day, my beard continued growing to my right. Weird. I thought it would eventually be heavy enough and let gravity pull it down.

Born Under A Call Sign

I stole this from Fazri. The What Your Name Means (Numerology) test.

I agree with those in bold and disagree with those that have been struck out. My own comments are italicized.

There are 15 letters in your name. Those 15 letters total to 75. There are 6 vowels and 9 consonants in your name.

Your number is: 3
The characteristics of #3 are: Expression, verbalization, socialization, the arts, the joy of living.

The expression or destiny for #3:
An Expression of 3 produces a quest for destiny with words along a variety of lines that may include writing, speaking, singing, acting or teaching; our entertainers, writers, litigators, teachers, salesmen, and composers. You also have the destiny to sell yourself or sell just about any product that comes along. Sell out, maybe. You are imaginative in your presentation, and you may have creative talents in the arts, although these are more likely to be latent. You are an optimistic person that seems ever enthusiastic about life and living. You are friendly, loving and social, and people like you because you are charming and such a good conversationalist. Your ability to communicate may often inspire others. It is your role in life to inspire and motivate; to raise the spirits of those around you.

The negative side of number 3 Expression is superficiality. You may tend to scatter your forces and simply be too easygoing. It is advisable for the negative 3 to avoid dwelling on trivial matters, especially gossip. I don’t like gossiping; it never contributed to the goodness of society.

Your Soul Urge number is: 7
A Soul Urge number of 7 means:
With a number 7 Soul Urge you are very fond of reading, (I don’t read books!) and retreating to periods of being alone and away from the disruptions of the outer world. It happens not by choice that I’m alone and I usually have something to compose or take a picture of! You like to dream and develop your idealistic understandings, to study and analyze, to gain knowledge and wisdom. You may be too laid back and withdrawn to really succeed in the business world, and you will be much more comfortable in circumstances that are tolerant of your reserve, your analytical approach, and your desire to use your mind rather than your physical being.

You are very timid around people that you don’t know very well, so much so at times that casual conversation and social situations can be strained. You tend to repress your emotions to the extent that some people have a good bit of difficult understanding you. You tend to be very selective with friends and you don’t easily adapt to new environments or to new people very quickly. (This totally contradicts my charming and communicating conversationalist bit above! I’m not fussy and like adventure, sometimes.)

The negative traits of the 7 include becoming too much the introvert and isolated from others.

Your Inner Dream number is: 6
An Inner Dream number of 6 means:
You dream of guiding and fostering the perfect family in the perfect home. You crave the devotion from offspring and a loving spouse. You picture yourself in the center of a successful domestic unit.

And then there’s the Birthday Calculator that says:

You entered: 19 December 1983; you were born on a Monday under the astrological sign Sagittarius. Your Life path number is 7.

The Julian calendar date of your birth is 2445687.5. The golden number for 1983 is 8. The epact number for 1983 is 16. The year 1983 was not a leap year.

As of 7/7/2005 8:31:40 PM CDT, you are 21 years old; 259 months old; 1

Randomosity

Look at your computer time. You are getting sleepy. Well I am sleepy but anyway.

Head over to Kamigoroshi‘s site and help him to raise money for the National Cancer Society of Malaysia.

I haven’t done many things in years, including buying books, but I’ll probably go out and get this:
Bunny Suicides (the link will die in a few days due to legal issues.)

I also haven’t done quizzes of these nature:

You scored as Materialist. Materialism stresses the essence of fundamental particles. Everything that exists is purely physical matter and there is no special force that holds life together. You believe that anything can be explained by breaking it up into its pieces. i.e. the big picture can be understood by its smaller elements.

Materialist

100%

Modernist

94%

Existentialist

94%

Postmodernist

88%

Cultural Creative

63%

Idealist

56%

Fundamentalist

50%

Romanticist

44%

What is Your World View? (updated)
created with QuizFarm.com

I also watched War Of The Worlds, a good movie. Nice special effects, very neat lighting (in the beginning, notice how it has High Dynamic Range, something you’d see in Half-Life 2?) I actually watched it out of curiosity to see how much the ending could suck. But hey! It made sense, and I stood up, pointed and laughed at everybody who paid to see that movie. Then I realized I would have to laugh at myself too, it being the second movie I paid for this year. (Initial D being the first.) Why run to Boston? They drink tea unlike those Americans.

Edit: The girl in the movie was annoying. However she was not as annoying as this one guy who was on the phone in the cinema, standing at the back near a door. Just as the movie was getting to a lull, another guy told him off by shouting “OI! STFU!” (and we supported him) and actually walking up to the back of the cinema to ask him to get out of the cinema. That was cool. Cinemas could give free tickets to angry burly men to tell noisy people off. 😀

Face Print

Believe it or not, the newly renovated Xfresh fishtank has biometric technology. You press your face against the glass and it detects oil levels and shape, and lets you in.

Not.

We use the Cotag system where you hold your access pass against a tag reader (very much like Touch N Go) and it unlocks the door. For weeks, the door was not set up and could not lock, so anybody could just open the door. They fixed up the security recently so we now have to tag in.

Of course, a certain colleague (who shall not be named) forgot this. (Shows how often he comes in.)

This is the view from outside the office. Notice that below the Xfresh logo in the top-right corner, there is an oily face print!

I saw this colleague smash into the glass with a thud.

I forgot we had to tag in.

Well even in the old days before we had to, we’d use the handle (that shiny metal bar on the left), or if we were lazy we could use our hands to push. But to go headfirst?

For once, we can say, don’t use your head.

No it’s not me (my skin is so dry, the only place you can get oil using those blue oil wipes is by pressing on the blackheads on my nose.) No it’s not Shaz either.

Ewww The Perfume

I think crossdressing/transvestite/transsexual perfume salespeople rock.

If I had a department store, I would hire them for the night shift. Simply because:

  1. They are passionate about the job! They know their stuff! Salesgirls are generally uninformed about their product, around Malaysia at least.
  2. They can shout! “Paging for Ms. Lee!
  3. They’re less likely to be hit on by men with perfect vision.
  4. They don’t have a curfew. “Sial budak aku baik dia tak payah balik rumah.
  5. They won’t get bored and run away to work in KFC or something. A girl would probably just work for the money.
  6. They can reach for top shelves.
  7. They’re less prudish than those salesgirls.

So next time you see one of those, please understand that they are simply the better labor solution.

Edit: They also don’t have an excuse to be cranky every month. 🙂

Initial-E

So I did a few things the first time this year by watching Initial D.

  1. I paid for a movie. (Madagascar doesn’t count because I forgot to pay you back Azira! Ah well, have fun in Australia haha.)
  2. I watched a movie in Cantonese.
  3. I watched a movie based on an anime.

Believe it or not, my father and mother are Chinese, and so were their fathers and mothers. And so, it is merely prophetic fulfilment that I must watch this. It also buys me a chance to understand what people are talking about when they talk about Initial D the movie. I already felt left out with Star Wars 3. (I’ve watched the other 5 dammit.)

Despite being unable to speak Chinese, I assure you I am an Ah Beng. I like transparent red-lighted handphones. I had one. I speak loudly on the phone. I have danced in Warp before. I play Need For Speed Underground 2. I don’t play Initial D though, because well aiyah I play Daytona medium difficulty on automatic transmission.

So anyway, I was trying to spot Jay Chou, famous superstar. Was he the tofu delivery boy? No way. He looked like he delivered jellied cocaine instead. Damn stoned. It seems like every movie nowadays has an expressionless character (Keanu Reeves, Hayden Christensen…) Of course it can be attributed to his broody character, being abused by his father etc.

Here’s a spoiler for you: Nobody dies! That just reeks of sequel. If nobody dies, how are we stupid kids going to learn a lesson?

Hmmm, imagine what the sequel will be. Initial D2? Will the prequel (with the cool-as-tau-cheong-suay father) be Initial P or Initial R?

You: Uh, don’t they drive manual cars?
Me: Well there is this one scene where the girl puts her hand in his, and they hold hands the whole trip…

Pardon me dudes, I’m itching to play Need For Speed: Underground 2.

Decoy Radio

I’m supposed to get some sleep but I have some work to download. Anyway here is another segment of Albert’s Tricks And Tips (or AT&T as suggested by chez1978, thanks!) or Albert’s Methods. (Yes, I’ll keep the PPS Bash for later, and the Fete De La Musique 2005 too.)

Today I’m going to teach suggest how you could smuggle misappropriately bring in a electronic device into a cinema.

Smuggling A Gizmo Into A Cinema

I was going for an advanced screening of Batman Begins. My handphone was already sealed in a numbered bag, and I kept the matching number and my SIM card out of paranoia. However, the rules also said “no recording devices” but I was lazy to keep my digicam and lazier to wait to collect it later.

So I tried my luck, acting nonchalant as the guards used handheld metal detectors. Beep! I said it could be my keys and took them out to show. Then they pointed at my bag’s handphone pouch and asked what was inside.

I showed them this analog FM radio.

Okay pass.

So I managed to smuggle my digicam. I didn’t bootleg it though; my camera can only record movies of up to 3 minutes! 🙁 Besides, I am a law-abiding citizen, yo. (Okay so I’ve smuggled a bottle of water into Stadium Merdeka but that was no big deal because somebody got splashed with alcohol instead.)

What if the head of all movie piracy, as some say, is not Uncle Ho, a Chinese entrepreneur, but an Indian fella? The guy who runs lowyat.net is Indian! Colonel Sanders is Japanese! One of these statements is true!

Drawing Straws

Welcome to the first instalment of Albert’s Tricks And Tips (or something more creatively named that I’ll think of later.)

This one goes out to all the ladies.

Opening A Canned Drink With A Straw

Ever had a moment where you absolutely had to have a canned drink, but you just had a manicure, painted your nails, or just bit them off to stumpy oblivion? Fear no more! Now, you can save your nails, and if you are queasy whenever you open canned drinks, you don’t need to wince anymore.

First off you need to get a straw. Because really, would you like to taste the rat’s droppings on the surface of a canned drink stored in a dinky warehouse? (Uh gee 3 friends forwarded this, it must be true.) Nevermind that boxes of canned drinks are shrinkwrapped in packs of 24! Okay maybe you don’t want to get lipstick/lip gloss on the metal surface and want to look dainty and female by sipping through a straw. Plus it accentuates your cheekbones when you make that sipping expression.

Anyway, bend the straw at the halfway point as pictured on the left. Tuck it under the tab. At this point, you can hold the canned drink by the straw itself. This helps if the drink is too cold.

Now this is the part where you call me genius. Pull the straw and viola! Your canned drink is now open, and you can enjoy a refreshing cold drink.

Don’t worry, I do have more to come in… Albert’s Methods. Yeah. Albert’s Methods. It rhymes!